Community Rainbow Waves

Out Is The New In​

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Woman/Lesbian/Gay/Queer…it’s all good! ; )

I properly came out I when I was 25 as a lesbian, but I called myself Bi when I 1st talked about liking women when I was 22 and I fell in love with my best friend.
Growing up in a very religious family I didn’t hear the word gay until my early teens, but never heard the word “lesbian” spoken out loud.
Looking back it was so obvious I was gay as I’ve always “liked” girls/women. I had a crushes on celebrities and my mum’s and older sisters friends, but never put 2 and 2 together.
When I broke away from my family and started travelling the world from 19 year of age I discovered about the gay community. But it really hit home when I fell in love with my best friend when we were in the army.
I was so confused, so embarrassed and thought I didn’t want to be different. My religious upbringing really made me feel guilty and wrong. But luckily my friend was so understand, even though it was unrequited love and I was heartbroken. I went backpacking to Australia after leaving the army and really started hitting the gay scene. There I discovered I was a lesbian as I never was physically attracted to men.
After that, I travelled to London where I had several relationships with women, partied hard on the lesbian/queer scene and years later met my future wife.
We now have 2 kids and been together for 17 years.
So it’s been a long journey and I could tell you so many stories, but that is for another time!
Anyway, I wish everyone discovering themselves a great journey. It will all be ok xxx Romy aka MamaGoo5e

Lesbian

I have known as this community and knew I was a lesbian since I was a teenager at 16 years old, but I was still scared to come out and talk about it because I grew as a catholic from my dad’s side of the family since I was born and feel more different than besides being normal like them. 3 years later, I was in college and decided to come out 5 people months before I came out to the media. This coming april 2020 will be 8 year anniversary and through my ups/downs after coming out never gives me up to love what I want to be and my message to Dominique is to congratulate for finding a better path of what you want to be and always be yourself! #loveislove 🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈

I am QUEER

I was always attracted to both men and women and deep down I knew that I like both men and women as I don’t look them as genders I look them as beautiful heart. I am from India and I never got the courage to share this with my family that for me love is love but hopefully soon I will let them know that I am QUEER !!

Anaïs

I am 27 and I’ve liked girls for as long as I can remember. When I was 5, I wrote a love letter to a girl in my class, but never gave it to her ’cause I was too shy. Years later I found the letter and felt so embarrassed that I threw it away. At that time, I was already brainwashed into thinking that being queer was wrong and dirty. From that day on I decided that I’d never think of girls again, and that’s what I did… Until high school, at least!
I remember watching the tv show Skins when I was a teen just because it portrayed a lesbian couple and it was everything that I could find in terms of representation. I feel so happy for the kids today that have access to amazing content such as Wynnona Earp. Positive queer representation can change people’s lives <3
During high school I ended up kissing some girls thanks to Spin the Bottle, which gave me the courage to kiss a friend at a party at my senior year and I reeeeeally fell for her! I spent months with a major crush on her! At that moment I thought: ok, I’m definitely not straight! Maybe Bissexual?
I had some boyfriends here and there and managed to get my first girlfriend at college. And when we first got together, I remember thinking: so that’s how being attracted to someone is supposed to feel like!!
I never planned on coming out because I was still figuring out my own feelings. I was dating this girl, it was Dia dos Namorados (something like Valentine’s Day) and I was nervous enough having this secret relationship and stuff, but my mom could tell that something was off (moms, am I right?). She spent the entire day asking me what was wrong and why I couldn’t talk to her, until I burst out that I was in love with a girl.
My mom cried for weeks and went through all those grief stages, but my dad was my rock. We’ve never been close, me and my dad, but he really stood up for me when my mom was freaking out, and I believe we got closer because of that.
My first year out of the closet wasn’t easy, me and my mom argued a lot. Every week I would find a new video or research about sexuality and gender and try to explain to her that it was all normal and it wasn’t a choice. And so, a year went by, my first relationship ended, and we spent another year without talking about my sexuality at home. During this year I got to focus on my feelings and found out that I identified as a lesbian. Since that, I started living out and proud and my family followed along at their own pace.
Today we couldn’t be better. I’m engaged to the most amazing woman, who my family absolutely loves (yay!). We’ve been together for 6 years and we have 2 cats (living the dream! Hahaha). My fiancé is funny, smart, beautiful and always has my back. We’ve grown so much together, as a couple and as individuals, and I am really proud of this whole journey.
So, I just wanna tell you guys what other strangers on the internet told me before: The journey might be hard, but it does get better!
We all deserve to shine, to love and to live. Be proud and celebrate yourselves.

Fer

My first attraction to a woman was when I was 11 years old (2015) I didn’t really understand what was going on since I had heard something about that in my life since what my family believes and the way I was raised is that it is always a man and a woman so I thought that I had some flaw inside that made me feel very strong emotions towards someone that was not right. When I entered high school (2016) I had already heard and researched more things about the subject, on the one hand my family told me that the behavior of these people was unnatural and on the other hand the social networks began to ask for acceptance with the phrase ¨love is Love¨ which confused me more and more but one day on the program ¨supergirl’ Alex Danvers came out of the closet and I wished I was in his place, At that time I identified myself as a young bisexual woman, I began to watch programs like Wynonna Earp which is also one of the programs that has most marked my life from the way Waverly begins to accept her sexuality to her commitment to Nicole.
The first person I proposed to was my best friend and his reaction was better than I expected since he only told me that he supported me and then proceeded to ask me about her as if she was the most normal thing in the world and I loved that.
At my school I liked to talk to my classmates about it because sometimes my perspective and theirs helped us empathize with each other’s situations.
I hope that in a future there is no more the phrase ¨come from closet¨ and that all this is taken as something completely natural.

Fluid

Im only 15 and I’ve known since I was about 9 or 10. I’ve known for years but I came out to my friends and close family in early 2019. For me it was just noticing little things like in movies I could never keep my eyes of the girl although I found the guy good-looking, I always found myself matching myself with a girl from the movies like ‘what happened if me and her were together’. I was curious, but then I got a crush on a girl in my grade and I knew that well I’m not straight. My parents kind of figured out and they weren’t that surprised. But my brother accidentally outed me to my parents. It was funny. But I thought I was bi but it changes all the time so I decided to stick to fluid cause I don’t need a label. I love who I want to love. I don’t really care what you are x

Lesbian

I fell in love with my best friend but came out to my stepdads partner before my parents they was all supportive couldn’t of asked for more.

I Am A Work In Progress

I wish I knew from a young age that you should be your authentic self, that it is okay to be whoever you are. I’m now accepting of all kinds of colorful and different people.
Wish I could say the same about my country and my community.
I am from Georgia, the country not the US state, where people come from a very religious background. We have many old traditions and so everyone here is completely against the idea of
same-sex relationships. Growing up people around me always said how wrong it was to be different, I was taught to be a certain way. Around the news i saw lgbtq+ friendly places being raided by armed policmen, people being beat up and all kinds of riots and protests. I felt as if something was wrong with me. And so i started living in a world filled with so much hate, a world filled with negativity from myself and from others. Only when I started traveling ,and meeting all kinds of amazing and beautiful people, did I realize that it was okay to be your true self. I was always discouraged about seeking information regarding sensitive topics such as sexual orientation or gender identity, but I wanted to know more so I started reading about all kinds of people and about their stories. with time i was accepting of myself and others, realizing that it was completely okay to be attracted to only women. There’s still much for me to learn, so many people to meet and so many places to visit. And i wish that someday we can all live in a world overflowing with Love.

I’m a bisexual latina

I think that since I was little I always felt that something was off or that I did’t fit with the rest of my family or friends. I grew up in a place where being LGBT wasn’t something that you could be or see on a daily basis. I was your typical stereotype of being not so feminine, loooove soccer and hang out with the boys more so than with the girls. Oh the irony!

I remember that when I was 8 o 9 I had this “competitive” obsession with this girl in the opposite soccer team. I always thought that I just wanted to defeat her in every soccer match and If she didn’t play I would get very upset. Later on you start to see this “gays clues” that life would throw at you and don’t realize. Then, when I was in secondary school and puberty started I had this massive crush on a boy, the pretty boy of the school, so I got distracted for a while but deep down I still felt off from the rest. When I was 13 this boy got a girlfriend and for a while I thought that I was jealous of her but in reality I was jealous of both, at the same time!

Then, highschool happened.

When I was 15 I finally had the opportunity to see “gay people”. Yes, as ridiculous as it sounds. Back then representation was not something you could find in mexican telenovelas o any other type of show broadcasted. Internet was just starting to be a thing and basic education at school never tells you that not being a cis straight person it’s possible. So there I was watching girls kissing girls and boys kissing boys and then I knew that was possible but still didn’t questioned it within myself. I hadn’t realized that I’ve had feelings for girls before.

Not until I was 16.

I’ll never forget it.

I was in my biology class, bored as hell so I started to get distracted and while looking around I suddenly felt that someone was staring at me. So…I turned around and there she was, this beautiful girl looking at me. We shared a look, like a 10 seconds long look!…and I knew. Nothing happened between us mostly because I was scared. I’ll always regret that.

After that, research started, quizes about whether I was gay or not, youtube videos, webseries, Carmilla, clexa, Las Aparicio here in Mexico and eventually I came out to myself.

I was in fact, attracted to cis men and cis women, I was bisexual. So far I haven’t had attrattion towards non-cis folks but who knows?!

It took a while for me to know because my attraction towards men is not as strong as it is towards women so I thought I couldn’t use that label but who cares, I feel comfortable with it and sexuality is fluid. If I ever feel the need to change it , I will and there shouldn’t be anything wrong with it.

Once I figured that out I decided to come out to others.

I started with my bother, who by the way, is also part of the community! I was so funny when we both knew about each other.

Then, my mom. Poor soul, my bother had just came out to her and a week later her daughter as well. She was shocked I can tell you that but with some time she processed it and now she is even asking me to take her to a Pride Parade, gay bars and everything that’s gay because as she says, it’s what makes me happy and “gay people are so funny”

My dad found out because of her, she told him and he was cool about it.
I know that I am lucky to have a family that loves me and supports me no matter what and unfortunately that is not something everyone has but I know the world is slowly changing.

We will make it, maybe not my generation but the future looks better than the past.

XO XO from Mexico.

There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.

I knew I truly liked girls at the age of fifteen (I’m a 28-year-old woman now). How did I know? Well.. I was looking at my favourite poster.. and there she was, Avril Lavigne was pinned on my bedroom wall and there was me thinking “f*ck. I’m in love with you and how the hell are we going to meet?”. Don’t judge me.. come on! I was young and she was a hot skater girl! (she still is hehe). Anyways, that is how my story started.

I can’t complain because I’m aware of how lucky I’ve been during the process. To start, I came along with a girl in high school (just friends) who told me she was lesbian so she had to face the barrage of questions I threw out to her (bless her) to make sure that I wasn’t going through a “phase” of feeling homosexual. She helped me a lot. My dilema in that moment of my life was that I felt attracted to boys as well as girls so.. was I bisexual? Interestingly, I couldn’t imagine myself having a long-term relationship with a boy but I had really romantic ideas when thinking of girls.. (I’ve done spectacular romantic things by the way). I tried to find a label capable to represent me but I couldn’t so I honestly thought; “What the hell, the “label” is ME and if you don’t like it you know where the door is”.

I think that is the point of all this. From my experience, you attract your fears. There is a simple and real personal example (you are allowed to laugh, I know it is a bit ridiculous). I have selacophobia (shark phobia). Okay, I wanted to sound intellectual so I looked up the proper noun and I just pooped myself because there were pictures of sharks next to the definition (not funny). Anyways, due to my selacophobia I see sharks everywhere; people wearing shirts with sharks stumped on them, TV advertisements where in order to sell pills they show a shark swimming (why?? I mean..why??), and a large etc. This situation can be extrapolated to all of your life experiences. If you are scared of people because you think they may be judging you just because you are not “traditional” you will come across with people thinking that way. You have the power to attract whatever you want so be yourself. Mum told me once something really wise; “When you discuss something in front of an audience, 50% of them will agree with you and the other 50% won’t. Therefore, be yourself and you will be surrounded by those thinking the same as you do”.

Going back to the thread of the conversation, there is an important topic to be discussed; Parents. Here comes when everything got complicated. I experienced two very different reactions (my parents are not together).

Conversation with my dad:
(In the car. He was driving.)
Me: Daddy.
My dad: Tell me.
Me: I’ve got to tell you something important.
My dad: What is it?
Me: … yeah well…
My dad: …
Me: You like women, do you?
My dad: Yes. Why?
Me: Me too.
My dad: Oh. And are you happy?
Me: I really am.
My dad: Me too then.
(Simple and easy. Men style.)

On the other hand, it was completely different with mum. She caught me sneaking out with a girl (everyone knows mothers have superpowers). It was a difficult time for both of us. She loves me so much that she was scared of me being hurt. From her life experiences she knows that there are violent people whose ideals are completely radical regarding the freedom of love. I remember my mum crying in front of me, apologising because deep inside her she wanted to accept the situation without shame, she wanted to understand me but she couldn’t. Seeing your mum hurting that much breaks you heart into million pieces. Then I realised what I had to do. If I wanted her to truly accept me, I had to accept that she needed to fit all that emotions into her heart and I had to comprehend her worries so I told her that it was okay, that we would make it through no matter how long it would take. Time did its job though and now she is completely okay with it so do not give up on people! Everyone has their own odyssey so try to not rush others’ processes.

I know it is hard and sad thinking someday your parents will be gone, that friends come and go but there you are. You’ve got yourself and that is forever. You have to take care of your heart and soul. Good news are that the sooner you do it, the sooner will come the day you will get up and realise how strong and authentic you’ve become. And I’m sure that people around you will be there because they love see you being you.

Hope it helps!